The 19th Wife

"The 19th Wife" by David Ebershoff is really rather horrible. It digresses down too many paths and goes back and forth in history, distracting from the main story which is that of a young man trying to help his mother accused of murdering her polygamous husband.

Extremists in various religions insist on their rights to have polygamous marriages. And how convenient for these patriarchal men it is to have younger and younger wives to do all the cleaning, cooking, producing children and remaining obedient. Quite a power trip!

In the cultish backwoods of Utah and other American states, this slipshop polygamy exists as a way of keeping women and children ignorant and servile.

But the book gives little slips of insight into the life of a polygamous wife. She is shared property. She is a note in a diary as to when her husband will visit her, her needs, her children. She is a business arrangement.

What about the stories of the wives? They must be a miserable lot. What do they have? Do they know anything of kindness, gentleness or love? Or are they merely moved from one patriarchal home into another - their husband's - patriarchal family home, like a piece of property.

Men who run polygamous, patriarchal cults always say, "It has always been this way. It is tradition."

It was also tradition for Moses to live in a tent and herd goats. We could drag people backward to living in tents, herding goats, because it is tradition. We can keep people ignorant and servile.

But most people want something better for their children. They want them to have opportunities to participate in life - to be individuals who think and act for themselves - who have hearts and minds of their own and who are not anyone's possession or "goods or chattels".

Polygamy has been termed "backward". It also cries out the lack of value of a woman. They are bought like a herd of horses or cattle.

But for men of reason and women with self-esteem, there is no place for the polygamous marriage. It is demeaning to women.